December 13th, 2021
New Years: get the most out of your resolutions.
Introduction
Whilst I don’t believe there is such a thing as failure, only lessons, growth and redirections, I do want to shed some light on the inefficacy of the good ol’ New Year’s resolutions. When we resolve to have certain things, maintain certain behaviours, kick old habits to the curb, the intention we are actually setting relates to the way of being as opposed to things we are trying to attain or lose. Think about it what you’re saying when you resolve to cut down your digital time is actually I wish to be a person who lives more presently, I wish to free up time for things that matter, or when you resolve to give up junk food for a year you’re actually saying you wish to step into a healthier more vital version of yourself.
This shortsightedness when setting a list of things to attain or achieve leaves no room for us to actually sit with ourselves, reflect on our behaviours, our routines, lessons the year before has gifted us. In fact it’s as ineffective as jumping on the next dieting fad. Rather than tuning into ourselves, who we are as people and how we wish to show up every day, we, once again look for a quick fix. Sitting in this you realise you’re not only looking to shed kilos or to run a marathon in 6 months, what you’re actually seeking to be is an energised, enthusiastic, disciplined human.
When seeking to understand what a resolution actually is,
I found the following definitions;
1. a firm decision to do or not to do something
2. the quality of being determined or resolute
3. the action of solving a problem or contentious matter
Unpacking the resolution
The idea that we have things to correct about ourselves sets us up for failure as we go into our resolutions from a place of negative reinforcement rather than conscious intention. We are essentially saying I want to be here {insert goal} because where I am is not good enough. Instead we must be grateful for what we have before we are ready to hold more.
At the root of it, resolutions are just that, an intention. However, the way in which we go about them is perhaps where we stumble.
For a resolution to be effective, it must be:
- Translated into a goal and written down and read every day.
- Check in on your behaviours, how have you been acting today? Were my actions moving me towards my goal or away from my goals?
- Set your intention for the next day. What can I do tomorrow to help move me closer to my goal?
- Reflect on your confidence and belief in yourself. Ask yourself, what unhelpful beliefs are holding me back from moving me forward with my goal?
- Be grateful for where you are in relation to your goal. This will help you enjoy the journey and not just want to be at the end point.
- Let go. This process is as much about setting the goal, the process of reflection and calling something forward as it is surrendering and letting go of the desired outcome. When we release we inch our way closer to becoming the person we wish to embody.
So how do we get there, where should you start?
We believe there are 5 key ingredients:
- Understanding the power of the mind
- The power of affirmations
- Learning to love oneself and unpacking our limiting self beliefs
- Emotional self awareness
- An understanding of relationships and how to set healthy boundaries
So how about instead of creating an insurmountable list of resolutions this year, we resolve to reflect and do so often. I have created the Insite Mind Evolution Pack to incorporate all of these tools and more. Rather than just setting goals, we need to practice checking in with ourselves, understand our triggers and put steps in place to continue to support us to reach our fullest potential.
WRITTEN BY ALISA PETTIT
It’s never too late for a lane change. Insite Mind is the brainchild of one woman who after a decade spinning in the hamster wheel of the accounting world gave it up to live out her heart work. But it didn’t come without challenge and a little nudge from the universe in the form of a book Dealing with Difficult People. Upon opening it Alisa was surprised to find in black and white text “maybe it’s you”. So after several ego deaths and many personal development books along the way Alisa Pettit found her way to coaching. Now a fully fledged positive mindset coach and personal mastery guru Ali’s work helps people find their way through mindset teachings.